Halloween and Hippos

Halloween is officially over. We made the rounds. The goods were safely received and distributed (rain aside). Pumpkins house was viewed---well worth it! I have gotten a glimpse of my younger sons future as a stalker as he deposited a love note for his friends dad in the cloak of night into their mailbox. OY! I have realized multiple times over this week (and in my lifetime) that I am OH SO NOT a socially acceptable person. But I don't mind. I will take my children to buy fart machines and secretly pray the batteries die quickly. I will say what pops into my head and then wonder if awkward silences were caused by my statements. I have children--- my mental filters have been removed. I am forced to utter sentences like "Don't poop in the corner" and "Please don't eat the food you find under the couch!" I would apologize and try harder to be prim, but I sort of don't care. I do when I am around multiple other civilized people and I am clearly the least of those. But otherwise, I'm pretty much ok.

Now that Halloween is over, it is definitely the season for the HIPPO SONG!!! The radio station in Charleston would start playing Christmas songs on Thanksgiving day all the way through Christmas. The hippo song starts now and lasts through my birthday in this house. Below are the link and the words!!! Enjoy!!

Heather

http://www.newbie.com/Christmas/Hippo/i_want_a_hippopotamus_for_christmas.html

Meows

I recently gave a BRIEF thought to adopting a kitty for the meow obsessed Aurelia. While I was browsing through the available critters on petfinder.com I noticed that a white kitten was not available until November. This is because of fears about bad things being done at Halloween to black and white cats. According to the below story from Idaho, it extends to white bunnies there too. (THIS IS ONLY AN ARTICLE ABOUT AN UPCOMING LAW, NOT AN ANIMAL CRUELTY ARTICLE)

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061028/ap_on_fe_st/black_cat_adoptions

It's the Great Pumpkins, Charlie Brown!

Party day was a chaotic success! Rain be damned, those kids were getting their sugar fix! Be forewarned that if Daniel knocks on your door Halloween night, he is a superhero NOT an exceptionally endowed bosomy country star!






I also forced the family into the rain for a sneak peek at the PUMPKIN HOUSE!! After Donutbabe told me Ellen Degeneres was there Friday, it had to be done!!! JOY and GLEE, I drove and Ted (the better photographer in the family) was made to capture these images:









I plan to go back Monday evening to check out the joint in all of its festive wonder!! Let me know if you would like to ride along!!

Heather

Spooky Spooky

An interesting couple of websites listed in this Yahoo odd news article. Type in your information and see what it predicts your day of death as. I am likely to live until as last as March 10, 2069 (a ripe old 93). One of the slightly less friendly sites had my demise occurring in my seventies as I lay napping on a railroad track. Check them out, I used my husbands name on the nutty site and he is supposed to go at 39 during a malfunction in a highly exciting job?! Happy Halloween ;)

Also, anyone who can tell me more about the man, Ric Griffith, and his pumpkin extravaganza in Kenova will instantly win a giant hug (or prize of equal value). I MUST see the 16 by 16 foot wall of pumpkins flashing to the 1812 overture and I am certain Aurelia will LOVE the cat choir. I plan to drive by this place at least three (perhaps hundred) times!

Heather

Somebody Stop Me

In the past week, I have done a great many things. Many of them were little and don't amount to much, but a few were great (at least to me.) I spent time with my mother (she is doing better), I called my in-laws more often, I completed my crochet afgan for E. After completing the aforementioned afghan, I tried to find a poem or saying about homemade or crocheted gifts given with love online. I was unsuccessful.... so, I wrote one. It is by no means Emily Dickinson or Robert Frost but it served its purpose. My friend was very pleased with the afghan and has promised to send me her version of the poem. The original is this:

What began as balls of string
Has now become this single thing
Imperfect as I know it may be
May it always remind you a little of me
Every stitch and imperfection
Was made for you with my affection.

Please feel free to mock it!!

In other noteworthy achievements, I finished a pillow for Aurelia I started when she was born and her Raggedy Ann doll I bought as a Christmas gift last year (a put it together yourself kit). Today was the construction paper jack o lantern with Daniel's class and that went well. Tomorrow is the Fall Party (EEEEK) and in the meantime, I have baked cookies and am crocheting dishcloths for my aunt. This streak must end. Really, or I may have to check in somewhere for a "vacation"!!

These are some very strange videos that I happen to think are quite amusing. You also, you may not. I love you anyway!




http://www.rathergood.com/fishy/

or my very favorite for absolutely no good reason

http://www.rathergood.com/gaybar/

Live Love Laugh

I read a story to the kids tonight called ," I miss you, Stinkyface." I love those books. But as I was reading about how the boys mama would catch a cheetah to race her home to him my voice cracked. I was missing my mom. Now, my mom is perfectly fine (save the cough she can't shake) and sitting in her house in Charleston. But I was missing more specifically the past mom and childhood. I can't consciously remember my mother reading to me, but I know she read hundreds of stories. I miss spending every Saturday night at my granma's house. I am already missing my children as they grow and need me less. I want the freedom, I crave it don't get me wrong. But I think we all know that when we are little we really want to be big and when we get big we miss being little. I miss not realizing there were bad things in the world. I miss never thinking my most loved could some day leave this world. I want to believe that we can live forever in good health and spirits again. But being grown up and knowing otherwise, I will read Stinkyface books, smell my kids hair, look at them when they sleep, call my mom and granma more, and try to appreciate every good thing as long as I can.

But if Peter Pan could bring me some of that magic dust, I'd be on the fast train to Neverland!


Heather

Autumn on my street

Many developments over the weekend. A friend has visited for the weekend. Jenny up the street says her mom is now reading my blog too! HI JENNY'S MOM! We have acquired more free furniture and it is actually useful. I spotted the cemetery man again while my friend was with me. She said she would stop if there weren't kids in the car. There are never not kids in the car. I busted my oldest in a few deceptions, but he wasn't doing drugs or planning any sort of mass destruction, so I guess I still love him.

In more serious news, my mother still has a horrendous cough after her surgery. She had her follow-up appointment with the local cardiologist and came away feeling let down. He didn't give this cough or her condition the attention and treatment I believe he should have. He discussed her condition with her sister (while she was in another room) but failed to have any meaningful disclosure with her. I could hear the shakiness in her voice and while she is usually the strong one, Monday morning some doctors are going to be talking to one persistent and perturbed daughter. I am hoping she feels up to going out for a short (or long if she feels well enough) drive to admire the changing leaves. I know she loves to see them. And I love her.

My father-in-law had his hip replacement this past week. They had to place bands around the top of the leg bone to keep it from cracking more. UGH. After the surgery they gave him over three pints of blood in two days. When they performed some tests to see why he was still weak and dizzy, they discovered a blood clot in his leg. So last night, after he sent his wife back to her brother's house for the night, they rushed in unexpectedly and placed a filter in his aorta. When I called this morning, they were hauling him off the physical therapy. And last I knew, they are going to replace the other hip within a week.

So in light of my mother and my father-in-law, I have NO problems. My life is 100%. I will be appreciative and grateful for every move I make. I will not complain..... until I forget that I don't have it bad. Unfortunately, my state of mind may wear off faster than I'd like. So if you catch me complaining, smack me and tell me to get over it. It COULD be WORSE!!

Heather

PS Saw the movies Click and Prairie Home Companion over the weekend and enjoyed Click about 3 stars (highlight of the movie involved David Hasselhoff in a body function scene) and Prairie Home Companion was an absolute snore. I love that radio show and was really set up in my mind to enjoy. Such is life.

We have survived Dentist Day! Now only six more months of waiting for the next one! Yippppeeee!

Yesterday, Ted's dad went under the knife for the umpteenth time since we have been married. His replacement hip was being put in. They found no signs of the infection that was there last time and plan to give him an entire week (gulp) before ripping out the hip on the other side and putting in another turbo hip. (In theory, so he won't break the "new" hip). The surgery started after 5 pm and we heard he was out of surgery around 9:15 or so. Peggy (my mom-in-law) says he was doing great, but it's hard to tell when someone is totally unconscious.

In other news, a teacher from my childhood elementary has been formally accused by the FBI of possessing child pornography on two of his computers (none in the school). I would not make a good juror for this man, because I am thoroughly convinced he has done more than stare at the pictures. His potential sentence for the crime he is currently accused of is up to 10 years in prison, $250,000 fine, lifetime supervised release, and the loss of his teaching license. If any victims have been watching the newscasts, I hope they step forward to see this man never gets out of jail. Just in case you haven't seen the news, he was a teacher at Pinch Elementary in Pinch, WV since around 1987 and his name is Garland Eary. The pictures were discovered in June of 2005 and from what I have heard, his wife was the one who turned him in. Bravo (if that was her first knowledge of his evil). I am not usually this hostile, but pedophiles make me crazy!

Last but OH so not least, Baby Girl peed in th potty voluntarily the other day! NO repeat activity, but we are hopeful!!!

Heather

So today is the DAY! D-Day! Dentist Day!! Excitement was in the air this morning! Tick Tick goes the clock until 3:30 is here.

Ok, now I have to say, I have had no comments for quite some time, and I am feeling lonely and downtrodden. Give a sister a shout out, gee whiz!

Heather

Between my house and Walmart, there is a cemetery alondside the road. Several times I have seen a man parked there sitting on the ground staring out over the rolling hills of people passed. The first time, was late in the summer and he was sitting near a new grave. Today, I passed him again. He had a black trash bag on the ground to sit on and his oxygen tank beside him. He looked so sad and I wanted to stop and offer some sort of comfort. But I just drove by. I am not sure if any words or deeds from myself would have helped him or if he was helping himself just by being there.

I am a goofy person who deals with every situation with comedy. Bad comedy, but comedy nonetheless. I am not a big cryer and I don't usually have words of value in times of strife. But I could have sat beside this stranger to be sure he was ok. But I went on to Walmart to buy stuff. I hope he isn't all alone. I will be thinking of him for a long time.

Would you have stopped?


Heather

Day in Summary

Daniel couldn't find either of his coats. He ended up wearing mine!
Aurelia stripped nude as a fond farewell to her visitors!
Cory and Daniel received excellent report cards! Two B's and the rest A's for Mr. Adam.
(Daniel was very highly praised in the comments area!)
I had to retrieve the oldest from the school due to a stubborn bus driver who refused to allow him to get off at his friends stop and simply returned him to the school instead!
The first night in my attempt to give Aurelia a standard bedtime that does not involve me holding her until she passes out was somewhat successful. The first go round she screamed for me for a few minutes, until giving up and screaming for Daddy! I went in comforted her, held her for a few more minutes, and then tucked her in again. More screaming, but less time. She was asleep by 9 pm.

NOW---more crocheting!

Heather

I am not a great crocheter. I only do flat, rectangular projects that involve single, double, or triple stitches. I can crochet two skeins into a blanket at once, but that is the height of my crochet skill. But I love to do it (when I can get Aurelia off of my lap).

I am two precious skeins away from completing my friend E's long-promised afghan. When I finish that, I have unearthed some unfinished quilting and sewing projects from last year. (A puppy printed blanket for Daniel and a Bessie Pease Gutmann print pillow for Aurelia) I believe these will subsidize my Christmas stash nicely.

A word to all who read: I cannot bind a quilt. So if you know someone who can, I will be in the market soon to bind three I think. Needle and thread, I can handle. Sewing machine, hospital trip.

Now to convince the kids it's a good thing that Mommy is otherwise occupied. Wish me luck.

Heather

There are several blogsites I would like to list as links, but I have no knowledge of how to do this. Any help would be appreciated. But for the moment, I will give you my longtime favorite
http://www.thesneeze.com/

The section titled STEVE, DON'T EAT IT is by far some of the best stuff ever.

And for true dedication from a friend check out today's story on the

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/

Halloween is coming, but the date October 18th cannot come and go fast enough! Since mid-September, my son, Daniel has known that he has a dentist appointment on that day. Now, you may think this is cause for panic attacks or passive restraint. Quite the opposite, my kids LOVE the dentist. Since Cory refused to let my regular dentist fill his cavity at age 5, I have taken my kids to a pediatric dentist. Even I wish I could go to this dentist. There are flat screen tv's over the dental chairs, theme rooms for more complicated procedures (i.e. Nascar), video games, air hockey and a kids slide in the waiting room. Who wouldn't love it?! But Daniel has asked 42,654 times a day since he realized when it would be, "How many more days til Oct. 18?" Now Cory/Adam, who is big enough to know this really peeves me, is in on the act! BTW, this is no reflection on the dentist, he is just doing a great job and my kids LOVE, did I mention, LOVE him.


http://www.wildaboutsmiles.com/


Well, once the visit is over, the countdown to Halloween will begin. Daniel is also a little OCD about his costume (which is in the backroom, shhhhh, don't tell him, or you know what I will hear everyday!!). He is going to be Spiderman with fiber optic lights on the chest and mask. In my day, we threw on Goodwill clothes, lots of trashy makeup, a little glitter, and called ourselves gypsies. Oh well. Aurelia was supposed to be Cookie Monster, but she refused to accept the costume should be worn. She only wanted to admire it from a safe distance. So back to Walmart, where we exchanged it for a leopard outfit that does not require her to put it over her head. I suspect that is why CM fell out of favor. But, she does love her some MEOW, so it will be just fine.

Daniel just asked me AGAIN how many more days til the dentist! Only five more days, but I am not sure he is going to live that long!

Heather

Today is Q & A. I will be answering several questions posed to me throughout my day.

The first question is "What is a pud?" The link below should shed some light on this.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=pud

Being unaware of the meaning, I called my six year old son a pud earlier this evening. This is because he was asking if he could have more of the gelato we bought from Gino's. The gelato's that is $5.95 per PINT and tastes no better than the stuff from Krogers. I advised each family member trying the gelato to SAVOR each drop because it would be their last (regardless of how it tasted). This brings us to question #2. What is gelato? See below:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gelato

Now the last question of the day has nothing to do with the first two. I once heard about a deterrent to sexual attackers and shared it with a friend the other day. The tidbit I shared was you should urinate or defecate on yourself and this SHOULD gross the attacker out. So the question begs is this effective? Well the advice below goes a little further. Take a look:


Preventing RapeIf you are in immediate danger of being raped, here are some things that you can do.
Make a loud noise - Carry a whistle or scream "police" to attract attention
Run - Only run if there is somewhere safe to run to. If there is no where to go you may aggravate the assailant further by running
Stall - Speak calmly and rationally. Try not to plead, cry or show that you're scared, this may be the reaction that he's going for.
Urinate or vomit - Do anything you can to repulse the assailant. Tell him that you have a STD or AIDS.
Fight - Women who resist attacks and act quickly are less likely to be raped, than those who are passive. The optimum time to react is in the first 20 seconds when the body releases chemicals in the blood that help to put up a fight. Be cautious if he has a weapon.
Keep alert - Even though it will be difficult, try to pay attention to as many details as possible, so that you can identify your assailant.
Get help - Call 9-1-1 as soon as possible. Police are becoming more willing to help victims of rape. You are not obligated to press charges or go to court.
Collect evidence - Do not bathe, shower, or douche. If you change clothes, put the clothes you were raped in into a bag and seal it.
Tell someone - Call the police, rape crisis counselor, telephone operator, friend. It is very important that someone knows and that it is not kept a secret.



Now I hope you all come away a little more informed about the world around you.
Nighty night
Heather

I recently went to the doctor to discuss just how bad I look on paper. When I list my ailments, I very much resemble a frail elderly woman. Make no mistake, with three children, I can ill afford to nurse any ailment (real or imagined). I manage just fine. I can cut apples and hold the big girl. I can unload 75% of the groceries from the car in one trip to keep her from running into the street (which to my dismay she does every chance she gets). I can lug three basketfuls of clean laundry up three flights of stairs to the "lair" a.k.a. land of Cory and his dirty drawers. I can help Daniel do his homework, while fighting off the girl and fixing dinner. But I cannot bend over gracefully or sit Indian style. The latter I have never been able to do.

So I go to the doctor and I say, "Relax, sit back, we'll be here awhile." I break out the list I made the night before because one of my mothering side effects is loss of memory with anything of importance regarding myself. After a good two hour visit with Mr. Doctor, I emerge with a novella of prescriptions. EGAD. My personal inclination toward pill taking is not to do it. I have always been reluctant to take even an ibuprofen. I just don't enjoy the thought of ingesting chemicals and I have never been tempted to take an illicit drug. But the thought of another fall down the stairs because of weak knees or a sleepless night because of a screaming back has gently persuaded me to at least try Mr. Doctor's solutions.

After picking up my sacks of Rx's from the lovely drive-thru window at Rite Aid, I start to read the information sheets that come with each one. I am looking for interactions they may have missed or side effects like uncontrollable diarrhea. Let me just say, what I read made me quite reluctant to take any of it. The side effects from one can cause the symptoms I am trying to avoid by taking another. And anytime this phrase...... can cause fatal (although rare) bleeding... are associated with something going in my body, anxiety is increasing!

Ideally, I could just power through the pain or inconvenience, like our grandparents did. But I am a big, fat wimp and I am caving. I would ask that you check to see I am not bleeding to death every other week though. Thanks :0)

Heather

For information on Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis (my particular affliction), you can visit
http://www.arthritis.org/conditions/DiseaseCenter/polyarticularJRA.asp
or for services provided to children with arthritis free of charge
http://www.shriners.com/Hospitals/_Hospitals_for_Children/

What drives me to take my kids to places where there are large numbers of other kids? Free stuff! I don't care what it is. If it is free, it is going home with me. Although, I am puzzled about the "girls" bag my daughter received today. It had a book on beauty tips (ok), and a Ziploc baggie from the Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Um, ?? I mean, it has several washcloths, two bars of soap, FOUR toothbrushes (adult sized), a comb, and a tube of off brand spearmint toothpaste. To this I say, WTF?

The event was the 35th anniversary of a child services organization. I am all for it. Why the care package that looks like it may have once been destined for a Katrina stricken Louisiana?

I guess our family will be squeaky clean (if we can convince Adam to wear clean drawers!) for at least a week. Quickly, come smell us, it won't last long!! LOL LMFAO

Thought you were gonna come here and live some humorous event vicariously through me? Well, now you know, I am just a crazy woman with DSL and a keyboard!!

Night all
Heather

Today I took my kids to a pumpkin party. It was great! Good food, new friends, no major snot producing meltdowns!! AND we have decorated pumpkins (even a carved one thanks to donutbuzz). Overall, five star good time.

Then we came home to get ready for Adam (I give up, I will call him Adam)'s first homecoming at his new school. Now, the boy claims to have two dates. I dunno. But he has all sorts of pre-dance activities planned (without parental consent). I say, no, you can go out to eat, I will take you, pick you up, deliver you to the school, and pick you back up at exactly 11pm. Not 11:01.

The plan evolves and we determine I will also be taking his friend and her date. No problem. I would rather do that than wonder about who he is with. But during his frenzy to get ready, I notice something. Something disturbing. Let's backtrack:

Yesterday, Adam's "band" gathered after school at our house. When they went up the stairs, I told Adam to pull up his pants because his red plaid boxers were VERY clear!!
Fast forward, two baths later, in the kitchen he stretches. His shirt rides up and what do I see peeking out of his sweatpants? NO, NOT THAT(sicko)..... the red plaid boxers!!!

I screeched "Are those the SAME underpants?" His guilty look revealed all. I chased him to his room with a bottle of bleach and a scrub brush. He's clean now. VERY clean.

Well, he's been carted off now. I hope he has a really good time. And I hope he changes his britches, on his own, before the next phase of the moon. I hope, anyway.

Heather

Lyrics for: Rock And Roll Lullaby

She was just sixteen and all alone
When I came to be
So we grew up together
My mama child and me
Now things were bad and she was scared
But whenever I would cry
She'd calm my fears and dry my tears
With a rock and roll lullaby
And she would sing sha na na na na na na na ...
It will be all right sha na na na na na....
Sha na na na na na na na ...Now just hold on tight
Sing it to me mama (mama mama ma)
Sing it sweet and clear,
ohMama let me hear that old rock and roll lullaby
We made it through the lonely days
But Lord the nights were long
And we'd dream of better moments
When Mama sang her song
Now I can't recall the words at all
It don't make sense to try
'Cause I just knew lots of love came thru
In that rock and roll lullaby

At 3:44pm, fifteen long years ago, a scared, single sixteen year old girl gave birth to an 8 lb 8.5 oz baby boy with strawberry blond hair and crystal blue eyes. From the second he drew his first breath that boy was the most important thing that ever happened to her. The fear that had been with her for the last nine months melted into the background and she knew with every fiber that she would do whatever she had to do for this sweet baby.

I love you, Cory. I have loved you from the day I knew you were coming into my life. I will always love you. I am proud of you. You are becoming such a good, kind, and caring man.

Happy Birthday to my firstborn!!
Love
Heather

PS I did veto my mothers vote for ironing today. I believe my exact words were akin to Hell no.

PPS. Daniel has informed me that he will be on a show called Chompchat on Discovery Kids (all in his mind) talking about his hamster, Hamstey, who "is fat and poops alot" and Maggie. Maggie is the dog we found a new home for close to two months ago. When asked what he would say about the beloved pooch, he said, "I would say I play with her alot." Can we all see the conundrum here?

Heather

Ok. Some of the things NO ONE tells you that you may utter upon becoming a parent:

1). Aurelia, please, do not repeatedly beat your brother in the back with a dancing hamster that sings "Lowrider".


2) Daniel, you may not marry your sister. NO, I AM SORRY, YOU REALLY CAN'T!


3) Cory/Adam, please do not drink from your bathtub faucet at 11 :47pm. (or any other time for that matter). Kindly go to the sink and use a cup.

Also, no one tells you that even though your children are spaced out from 15yrs to 2 yrs, they will tag team your tired heiny and plot to deprive you of any sleep. I believe this plan of action may last well into their retirement years.

A final thought: My mother asked me to set up her ironing board today. To iron. Clothes.

That being said, you should understand that I own an iron, but have never used it. I don't even plan to, but I do believe in being prepared.

My mother had OPEN HEART surgery 2 WEEKS ago. She has scrubbed a toilet and asked to iron since she has been home. I HAVE TO BE ADOPTED!!!!

Heather

I am so tired tonight that I all have to give you is this link

http://www.myheritage.com/FP/Company/tryFaceRecognition.php

Night all
Heather
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ