Bleeping piece of junk

I have been absent from the blogging scene for a few weeks now. It seems that I will have to use the laptop for anything that requires not being a bleeping piece of junk. I have been reading everyone's blogs and must say you are all very humorous.

But today I must relate my son Daniel's view of the world.....

He has been pretty dreamy with his speech lately. He just kind of lets sentences out in an ethereal breath. But that doesn't mean they make a lot of sense.

Last night he was talking breathily about my homemade chocolate chip cookies. I said I would make some and send them to his class on Monday. He looked lovingly at me and declared,"I knew you were thinking about us. Me and my whole classmates." Sigh.

At bathtime, I was washing him and he asked why I wasn't washing his face. Normally his father washes him like he's possessed and with a mission. I told him I had already washed his face, just gently. He breathed, "I love you more than daddy washes dishes." Um, ok. Then with even more rapture he declared,"I love you even more than you do the dishes." Yup, gotcha. Just dry off

Then he said, " I know how they washed dishes in the 1970's. They had to use a sponge to wash it off and then they put it in the water to dry. Can I wash dishes sometime like they did in the 1970's?" (With puppy eyes and true desire)

Of course, Daniel. Of course.

Mother's Day

My youngest son clearly has issues.

The book he gave me for Mother's Day had question starters that he finished.
For example:

I wonder if... she loves me more than my brother.

I wonder how... she knows what I am doing, like playing Pokemon with Cory.

I wonder when... she will pick me up from school.

And later in the day this conversation took place:

Daniel: I think Dad needs the code for the computer.

Me: Nope. He already knows it.

Daniel: Tell me what it is.

Me: Nope. It's just for grown ups. Ask me when you're forty.

Daniel (son of my loins who was comforted by my loving arms and nourished at my bosom):
When I'm forty you'll already be dead.

So apparently, you should all get your visits in now.
Night all
Heather

The Nature of Things

Rest In Peace
Hamstey/Lenny (the hamster)
July 2005-May 5, 2007

My mother is a saint and has taken all of our children to her home for the weekend. I will have to discover a way to force her to accept a token of appreciation because she just keeps throwing my money back at me.

While our children are gone, Ted and I have driven around in our Super Beetle and just hung out. We have sung old songs and laughed at silly roadside junk.

We passed the cemetery and I asked Ted to pull over. I haven't seen the man who had an oxygen tank there for some time and I have been meaning to check the grave. I learned their names and felt better to see his side of the plaque is not yet engraved with an expiration date.

Before we left for the evening, my husband went to clean the hamster cage. Unfortunately, the poor dear was DOA. An appropriate burial spot was selected and he was interred in the backyard, behind the garage.

Many of you will remember that the moving on of our family dog was not noticed for a VERY long time. Our current plan is to wait until a question is posed to us by Daniel. Then and only then will we be forced to discuss the passing of Hamstey/Lenny.

Maybe it was part of the pet food recall. Maybe it was the unexplained name change halfway through his life. Maybe it was his giant hamster hemorrhoids. Goodbye, Hamstey/Lenny. I will miss your squeaky wheel and your smelly smell.

Night all
Heather